The Beginning

Recipes to Save a Marriage By. This title came to me several years ago when I first began to realize dinners at home were saving my life, and saving our relationship. In the fall of 2005 my partner Craig and I received the news that our tiny baby girl had severe epilepsy, as well as microcephaly.

The table has always been central to our relationship. Like many couples, we fell in love eating together, and eating in New York City, what a joy: scrambled eggs and toast at Le Gamin, Huevos Rancheros at Shopsin's, Steak au Poivre at La Luncheonette, Ginger Scallion Lo Mein at Noodle Town, Flounder and Tempura at Omen, Panna Cotta all' Aceto Balsmico at Il Buco.

After our daughter was born and we realized her health problems, we poured all our resources into her care, and eating at home became a necessity. I, while incredibly stressed by new motherhood and the intense worry about Colby, was happy to be eating home, at our tiny table, in our tiny kitchen, in our tiny apartment. For Craig is the most astonishing cook.

These are not recipes to save a marriage. There are no magic spells or even many metaphors. Rather, these are the recipes, the food we are eating and cooking while we work to save our marriage. Save sounds dire, and some days it is. The stress in our house when Colby is not well shatters our patience and our hope. Some days we need saving, and we do that, in part, by sitting down together, eating and talking. Other days our time at the table at the end of the day with our two darling girls is the place that we thrive. We talk about the successes of our day, the beautiful things we noticed. The table is where we savor the good and peaceful moments.